Pregnancy Update

After our regular scheduled programming-I mean Dr’s appointment yesterday :P- I thought I’d do another pregnancy update. Looking back for the other I did, I quickly realized it’s been a good while since I’ve updated (oops!).  So, without further ado:

How far along? 26 weeks & 5 days

Weight Gain? Around 13 pounds

Maternity Clothes? All of them. Just all of them lol My favorite thing is my Jessica Simpson top. I can still wear some of my stretchy tops & dresses, though.

Stretch Marks? On my sides

Belly button in or out? Still in…miraculously enough 😀

Sleep: For the most part, this is still okay. It is starting to get a bit interrupted with random bouts of insomnia, back/hip pain, & trips to the bathroom.

Best moment this week: Hopefully, this will be passing the gestational diabetes test we took yesterday *fingers crossed. Until this can be confirmed later today, it was our appointment going well yesterday & hearing everything looked fine &, again, being told he’s a, “big boy.”

Symptoms: My heartburn & nausea is back

Miss Anything? I still miss sushi & wine. But, again, I’d happily give that & anything else up for life if it meant I got to have this.

Movement: LOTS!!!

Cravings? Again…SUSHI!!!! &, oddly, rum…this baby is a pirate! 😛 Also, anything sweet.

Food aversions? Chicken!!!

Queasy or sick? Sometimes

Looking forward to? Our baby shower I never thought we’d get to have tomorrow!!!! We are having one near our hometown for our family & friends there & another at our home near the end of the month.

Anything new? Instead of monthly appointments, I’ll now be having biweekly appointments….which is exciting & mildly scary at the same time since that means we’re nearing the end & we aren’t anywhere near ready yet. We also signed up for hypnobabies & begin classes on the 12th of this month!

Complications / Medications? Still taking Lovenox injections, baby Aspirin, & Methylfolate daily. Complications: None since whenever ending infections have ceased!

Nursery Update: Yeah, about that….we haven’t done anything since the last update 😀 Another oops! We have what we plan on hanging above the dresser & decorating, just need to mount it to the wall so I can decorate it. Also still on the list: finding what I want to hang behind the crib/decorate, finding bedding I want, & curtains, & either having the carpet in his room professionally shampooed or putting down the rest of the laminate flooring we have left over down in there.

Impromptu Pregnancy Update

We have declared this week the week of sickness at our house. Last Saturday, Scott was diagnosed with the flu. Commence panic for paranoid preggo afraid of any & all complications lol Despite the quarantine (him sleeping in another room the rest of the weekend) I was sure I was also coming down with it also Sunday night. Thankfully, the feeling passed & I’m guessing, luckily, it was just sinuses. Despite that, I was still feeling pretty  lethargic & didn’t know why until I went to the Dr. today. Before this happened, even our fur baby Sophie came down with stomach woes (I.E. had explosive diarrhea for two days) & ended up having to go in for IV fluids. 😦

Anyway, on what lead to the impromptu trip to my OB’s office, yesterday I was fairly certain I either had a yeast infection or a UTI. I got in to see my Dr’s nurse practitioner this morning & guess what? I have BOTH. The week of sickness continues lol She said it was a good thing I’d came in because UTI’s in pregnancy can lead to premature birth (which I’d read because I’m crazy & read everything that could go wrong lol). Semi less dramatically, I was also informed, if it spread to the bladder, pregnant women had to be hospitalized & receive IV antibiotics. For the infections, I’m currently on 4 days worth of antibiotics for the UTI until they get the additional culture back on Monday to see where we need to go from there. I also have a 7 day supply of a yeast infection med.

Before any of these glorious infections were discovered, she measured my fundal height & listened to baby’s heartbeat with a tiny handheld machine. The measurement was right at 20 weeks & the heartbeat (156 I believe) was good & loud (yay!). She even added his growth & heart rate were, “perfect.” 🙂

& now, since I’m writing this, on to a pregnancy update I didn’t expect for another two weeks!

How far along? 20 weeks 4 days

Gender: Boy

Weight Gain? 7 pounds

Maternity Clothes? YES! They’re basically all I wear pant wise (& have been for the past month I’d say) & the shirts are super comfortable as well. My favorite bands are Motherhood Maternity & Pink Blush Maternity. If I had to pick a favorite item I’d go with my maternity leggings. I’ve also preggo leveled up & now need maternity underwear, as well as bras that I need to venture out for soon.

Stretch Marks? I’m not sure if they were already there? lol but I’ve noticed some on the sides of my hips

Belly button in or out? In

Sleep: For the most part, this is still okay. I have had some random bouts of pregnancy insomnia. My nightly peeing had slowed down in the second trimester but has went insane this week…& now we know why. I’ve also decided I need to invest in a pregnancy wedge like yesterday because it is hard for me to get comfortable sometimes (I was a belly & back sleeper).

Best moment this week: Unexpectedly hearing little man’s heartbeat today!!!!! It was especially reassuring given the infections scare. Also, his placenta is anterior which makes it harder for me to feel him move. I’ve thought I’ve felt movement a few times but can’t be sure that’s what it is most of the time. She said that, eventually, he’ll outgrow the placenta & feeling movement wouldn’t be a problem. Her estimate on feeling movement in this situation was 21 to 22 weeks.

Symptoms: I’ve lived in the bathroom & been fatigued lately but, again, I think that’s more from the infections than anything pregnancy related. Aside from that, I’ve had back pain but that’s about it I think

Miss Anything? Sushi & wine. But I’d happily give that up for life if it meant I got to have this.

Cravings? Again…SUSHI!!!! &, oddly, rum…this baby is a pirate! 😛 I’ve actually craved sushi so badly I’ve informed Scott, immediately after I give birth, he is to go to a sushi place & bring back 3 rolls just for me…it’s getting intense over here! Cravings as far as things I can have: sweets!!!!!

Food aversions? In the first trimester, any & all forms of coffee! I couldn’t go in or walk past a Starbucks (yes, me). Any kind of seafood restaurant had the same reaction. Oddly, I also couldn’t eat red pastas, which for me, is unheard of because I can woof down a plate of pasta any day of the week. At this point, both have passed now.

Queasy or sick? Not anymore

Looking forward to? My next Dr’s appointment on the 2nd & our 4D ultrasound on Valentine’s Day! ❤ Oh, & our doula meeting next Tuesday!

Activity: Before the week of sickness struck, Scott & I had gotten memberships to a local gym & went twice a week. He lifts weights & I walk the track….where I get lapped by the elderly. LOL I had also ridden the stationary bikes there but, when we attended our info session at Babymoon, the instructor (owner/doula) recommended we steer away from that as that tightens the pelvic floor. She also didn’t recommend the elliptical for a reason I can’t remember. So I guess I’m left with walking, squats, & wall pushups for now.

Complications / Medications? Still taking Lovenox injections, baby Aspirin, & Methylfolate daily. Complications: none other than currently have both a yeast infection & UTI.

Nursery Update: We’ve picked out our theme & purchased a few things for it. I’m not sure how much or when we’ll post pictures of this since, in less than a week of announcing his name, two people conveniently decided to name their child Elijah….or something entirely too similar. So….that may be under wraps for a while! But we’re on it! Actually, we had a bit of a mishap on that this week. I’d ordered a SPECIFIC color rocking chair for that room & excitedly had it delivered a week early…to discover it was the wrong color. Still waiting to see if the seller is going to work with us on that, or if they want to see my wrath on Amazon…to be continued.

OB Appt. Take Two

A very late update that I apologize for.

Our appointment went really well! My Dr. said, more than once, she was so happy with how things were going & I seemed to be doing everything right.

A few highlights:

-She took me off of my Progesterone…which I am still internally panicking about a bit. I told her this & this was her response, “This is the stage of development where gender is developing so it’s going.” No negotiations were made on my behalf this go lol

-Our NT part 1 screening was normal. I can’t remember the exact number but the measurement was within normal range.

-Our next appointment & ultrasound, where we hopefully find out the gender (AHHH!!!!!!!!!!), is January 5th…so, so far away!

-Baby had their hand on their face, which was funny because my nephew had his hand covering his face on EVERY ultrasound my sister had!!! They also waved at us & showed they are already cry stubborn by refusing to roll over, despite the tech’s best efforts. But hey, maybe that stubbornness has paid off so far 😉

Today, we are now 14 weeks….again, blowing my mind. Before this, I had radically accepted this was something that would never happen for me…& I was trying to be okay with that. Now that it is finally happening after all these very hard tries & the painful losses, it’s very surreal. This week, I’ve been thinking back on our journey to here, specifically with both IVF failures, & I cannot fathom how we are here now. I know it has a lot more to do with the big Guy upstairs than anything else but the awww of this moment will never be lost on me. The most surreal thing that has ever happened to me. To say that we’re thankful is the biggest understatement of all.

Please continue to pray for us in our journey. I’m still anxious about losing my progesterone & now I have a suspected UTI that I’m being treated for with pregnancy safe antibiotics that still bring paranoia to someone who has fought so hard for this moment.

Sending love to all of you ❤

Second OB Appointment

Funny thing….I waited until late evening to say anything on Facebook, or Instagram about our appointment because I was waiting for an order to come in. I took a leap of faith last week & ordered biweekly pregnancy update chalkboards that were suppose to get to me either yesterday, or today. In hopes of getting it yesterday, I delayed the update because I thought, “how cute would that be??”

Well….I got a few messages, texts, & comments from some very nervous people who follow along with the blog & our story. I also had a notification that my, “stats were booming,” here yesterday for that very reason. Had we not called our parents, I’m sure we would’ve gotten some threatening phone calls before I did post as well. lol More people than I would have EVER imagined have not only been following along with us through it all but also rallying around us, supporting, & praying for us & for that I will be forever grateful. If you have ever walked the road of infertility, you know that it’s a very lonely one. It’s trying, it’s soul crushing, & it’s just really freaking hard. Having so many people be invested in our journey is truly a blessing. We are so lucky.

And now for the update!

I was incredibly nervous yet again (shocker, shocker!), so nervous that I lived in the bathroom for a good amount of the day until Scott got home to get me for the appt. We made a last ditch effort for a quick snack at McD’s (AKA, to me, as Ronald’s Fat House) & got some breakfast…well, me & baby M got breakfast because that’s all we were feeling….apparantlyyyyy they very much enjoyed that sausage biscuit because they were moving like crazyyyyyy on the ultrasound!!!! We were shocked at just how much!! As we are having it done, with the ultrasound tech right beside me, Scott says, “It’s just like Sophie! Look at the way it moves its arms & legs!” grinning from ear to ear….thank God she has no idea that Sophie is our fur baby LOL The heartbeat was 169!!!!!!!!!!!!! *crowd roars

When we got back to my Doc, she came in smiling & seemed happy with everything. She said the ultrasound indicated good fetal movement & there we no signs of miscarriage. She asked about my symptoms & didn’t seem alarmed at all that my morning sickness is going away. When I asked her if light cramping was normal, at first, she gave me a mini heart attack. “Yes, but if it’s ever red you need to call here &, if it’s on a weekend that may get a little harder, so just go to an ER…though that’s not always a good experience.” Scott & I looked at each other, giving each other the, “that tell me about it!” look.  I did make sure to follow up with, “so it’s normal?” The second answer made me feel a lot better: “Yes, you should feel like you’re about to start your period all the time and it should go away by the second trimester. We just have to get you there, I think you’ll feel a lot better then.”

The plan remains the same as far as meds go. I’ll continue with Aspirin & Levonox until way into the pregnancy & stop taking the Progesterone at 13 weeks…which now makes me nervous since we’re quickly approaching that. I keep telling myself she noted I didn’t even need it anymore at our first OB appointment but I have to keep reminding my anxiety fueled self of that.

If you pray, please, pleaseeee continue to pray for us!!!!! Again, thank you all so, so much!!!!!!!!!! ❤ xo

Sidenote: I just want to make it clear that this blog will continue on & I promise it won’t be solely about pregnancy. I will still blog about infertility, as it will always be such a big part of our lives, mental health, & just random things that I really love & think you may, too 😉

No More Morning Sickness?

It happened. I knew it would eventually & I was terrified about this moment coming. It doesn’t help at all that this occurred a lot sooner than I ever thought it would.

I’m 9 weeks & 5 days today and I barely got sick at all this morning. TMI moment ahead (this is your warning to skip forward): I only threw up a little bit in my mouth this am & yesterday wasn’t nearly the amount I was throwing up. Even then I worried but today the anxiety was amplified by a million.

After taking the dogs out into the cool chill of the morning, I nervously paced around, then decided to go get a breakfast sandwich for distraction. While in line, I messaged a friend of mine who is a nurse practitioner & former L&D nurse to ask her opinion on things. She asked if I was almost 10 weeks & said that, typically, the further along you are in pregnancy, morning sickness resolves. She added that, in one of her pregnancies, her’s began to clear up between 10-13 weeks.

& you would think that would make me feel better….but, as another blogger I follow on WordPress said, “Pregnancy after loss is not like pregnancy, period.” (Nara, from Zero to Zygote). Pregnancy after loss is terror. A damn near constant state of terror. Every twinge in my body worries me. Everything my body does & doesn’t do worries me. Is this okay? Is it normal? Should I be worried?

Once you’ve endured multiple losses, I feel like a large part of the joy of pregnancy is taken away. I envy women I see announcing at 5 weeks on FB & talking about their pregnancy constantly. In truth, I’m afraid to mention mine for the most part because I think…will it still be here tomorrow? Are things still okay for now? Why is my morning sickness gone?

You become guarded & super paranoid. When something happens that really warrants worry, you’re doomed.

Please send some prayers up for us that everything is fine & it was just time for my morning sickness to be over. We have a Dr’s appointment & ultrasound Monday that I’ll now be even more anxious for.

What was your experience with morning sickness??? At what point did it go away? 

Caught In The In Between

As I’ve said so many times before, & will probably say again, pregnancy after loss/losses is one of the strangest things I’ve ever experienced.

I’m somewhere in between constantly waiting for something to go wrong & feeling like I’m living a lie in that, every day, I wonder if I’m still pregnant. Despite the symptoms, I still catch myself wondering, are things still okay today, right now? Will they be okay tomorrow, or this evening?

Since we announced, I was so nervous that people would ask me about the pregnancy, how it was going, etc. &, thankfully, they haven’t. Just a bunch of heartfelt congratulations abound. I was afraid of it because I don’t know what to say…I don’t know how others who have never stood where I am would take what I’m really feeling….what I wrote above. I feel like they either wouldn’t know what to say, would think I was bat shit crazy, or ungrateful given all we’ve been through to get here.

&, if you have been where I’ve been, you know ungrateful is the last thing that I am. But I’m not who I use to be…I envy myself before this last loss. I envy who I was then & how hopeful I was about things. I envy the excitement & all the things I had planned so early on that I knew, I knew, I’d get to…..now, I’m in this place where I’m afraid to buy anything. There are a few things I want for more announcement/update pictures at the next ultrasound &, in all honesty, part of me would like to go ahead & buy the week by week preggo updates that women do…..but the biggest part of me is just afraid to even consider doing any of that.

You know that too sweet Worth The Wait onesie we used in our big announcement? I didn’t buy it this time….I’d bought if for last time..&, by the time it arrived, we had no use for it then. It was stuffed back into our closet, along with all the IVF needles, behind clothes somewhere I’d never have to see it.

& there’s also guilt. Guilt that I should feel 100% elated to finally, finally, be pregnant after all this time, after all those awful treatments & heartache…..& I would love to feel that. I remember reading the test this summer & bursting into tears. I was ecstatic. When I saw it this time, the awful truth is I just froze…..I stood there, wide eyed in terror, & just stared. That is not the story I want to tell my child. The first would’ve been much more picturesque lol

Today, I’m 8 weeks & 3 days (wew!!!!) & I’m still so paranoid about every little thing &, at the same time, so afraid to let myself be happy again. This pregnancy seems to be going well….we had much higher numbers, my Dr. isn’t concerned with monitoring my HCG/progesterone anymore, & I still have my beloved (I am NOT being sarcastic lol) morning sickness. So, it would seem that things are fine…I’m so hoping after this next ultrasound, I’ll feel much more at ease that things are continuing to progress & everything is going to be just fine.

Please continue to pray for us, come on second trimester!!!!

Cat’s Out Of The Bag!

Since Scott couldn’t restrain from shouting it to the rooftops any longer………you were worth the wait. ❤

We had our ultrasound yesterday & everything looked great!!!!! &…..we even heard the heartbeat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We got a little scared at first because we saw her looking for it & didn’t hear anything until she moved a little more & there it was. Best sound I’ve ever heard. We were elated. The heart rate was 132 BPM & the tech said that was about average. Scan was also right in line with my LMP at 7 weeks & 2 days.

When we got back to the room & were waiting for the Dr. to come in after the nurse asked us 10000 questions, I looked over at Scott & said do you think we should wait? He knew what I was talking about. His face immediately looked like a kid in a lunchroom line who learned there were no more deserts.

The appt. went well & my Dr. is happy with my levels & the scan. Because of my history, she wants me to come back in for another ultrasound & appt in 3 weeks just to be safe, which I don’t mind at all. She also said I could probably be taken off the Progesterone at this point because my level is so good BUT, again, just to be safe, she’s leaving me on it until we enter the second trimester. Sine my HCG level was so good last Thursday she thought there was no need to repeat it at this point.

Before I left, they took what felt like 10 swabs (it was probably only 5 if we’re bing honest lol) from my vajayjay, felt my cervix, & did a TON of blood work that almost made me pass out….but I got my favorite fro yo after so all was well 😛

Symptoms:

-Morning sickness. I was probably the happiest person alive for this to happen. I sent my sister a text with those celebration emojis and her response was, “what is wrong with you?” lol It started on Monday & has lasted through the week so far. My OB gave me some vitamins that are suppose to help with it so maybe I can convince myself to take them in a few days. In truth, I love my morning sickness because I feel like it’s my body saying, “Hey, things are still alright!” Also, I found an article saying that you’re less likely to miscarry if you experience morning sickness sooooo…..I’m hanging on to that!

-Fatigue. I’m still a lazy Mazy.

Next appt: November 7th

As always, thank you so much to everyone who has supported us through this journey & continued to pray for us along the way!!!! We appreciate you more than you know!!!!!! Please keep up the prayers that this pregnancy keeps going well!!!!!

Also, thank you to all who follow along on the blog & did NOT spill the beans before we did….I didn’t wanna cut anybody ;P

 

A Late Update

Most of you probably won’t be surprised that I did go in for labs again on Thursday. Actually, I ended up being a little surprised because I hadn’t really planned on it BUT Scott & I had breakfast out that morning & then I had to go in to the Dr. because I got an infection so I thought what the heck?

I got my labs right after breakfast & got a call back about the infection right as I walked out of the building. The nurse told me it was probably best to just come in so we knew I was getting the right kind of meds. They fit me in after lunch & I asked about the results (shocker!).

HCG: 25,000

My Dr’s nurse also called me about the results as she isn’t who I saw & said that my Dr. thought my numbers were, “fantastic.” I started breathing a little easier after that. Our first appointment & second ultrasound is this Tuesday (just 3 more days!!!!!!) so we’re excited & nervous about that. I’m so hoping they can get a heartbeat at this one. I know the receptionists tell people they don’t want them to come in for a first appointment until 8-9 weeks but I specifically asked my Dr. last go around if I could come in sooner because I had never made it that long, hence those far off appointments were useless to me. She agreed so, when appointment time rolls around, I’ll be 7 weeks & 2 days.

Lots of prayers things keep going smoothly & we can hear that little heartbeat are greatly appreciated!!!!!!!!

&, for your entertainment pleasure, a funny story about giving myself my injection last night. We went out to dinner around shot time so I had to give myself my shot in the bathroom. Since I happened to be sporting a dress, I ended up having to do it in the stall. When I walked out, I was holding the needle (cap on) with a baggy I’d kept my bandaid & alcohol swab in. There was a woman standing outside the stall who looked at me strange & then did NOT go into the stall but instead continued to wait for another…..pretty sure she thought I was shooting up LOL Infertility is just really fun sometimes…….

The aftermath……..

On The Rise

I can’t complain about today’s blood work but it sure started off on the wrong foot. I left the house early this morning & signed in for labs like I normally do. After sitting there way longer than usual, the receptionist called me back up to inform me the order was not in. I told her I wasn’t sure why because my Dr. ordered repeat labs twice weekly. She wasn’t getting an answer at their office because the phones were staying busy so I ended up hanging out to skim bits & pieces of HGTV. After nearly 40 minutes, problem solved.

Early this afternoon (thank God), the nurse called to say my Dr. thought my numbers were, “fantastic.”

My HCG is 14072 & she said my Progesterone was still above 50.

With that, she said, “It looks like we’ll see you next Tuesday for your first OB appointment & ultrasound in the office.”

I asked if I was still suppose to go in for another blood check Thursday & she wasn’t sure so put me on hold. She came back a few seconds later to say she grabbed my Dr. coming out of a room who said,  if I wanted to go in again, I could but I didn’t have to. So that made me feel more at ease since they don’t appear concerned.

I’m not sure if I’ll go in again, or just wait until next week. Pregnancy after loss is a terrifying thing, let me tell you, so peace of mind is always vital. For instance, TMI, I went to the bathroom this am &, when I checked after wiping (which I always do in the midst of my paranoia), noticed it was yellow & possibly even a light something of another color (totally making sense so far, right?). I text said potential unknown color to my husband then called him in a panic. He was his usual self, talking low & reassuring…that man needs to look into hostage negotiating, I swear. We concluded that it was probably just yellow & nothing to worry about.

& then my stomach started to hurt. Oh, no. Panic resumed….until I realized it was just gas & I happened to run to the bathroom a lot that day. So it’s fine lol but the crazy pregnancy after loss lady says, “who knew!”

In addition to the above, symptom wise, I’m still just really fatigued/tired all the time, my boobs are weird, & I’m getting headaches. But I’ll take any & all preggo symptoms happily after the road I’ve trudged to get here.

Here’s to hoping things continue going smoothly & our first appointment/second ultrasound go smoothly! I’m hoping we can hear the heartbeat because I feel like that will put us more at ease as well. The anxieties of pregnancy article Scott sent me after my frantic picture/phone call noted that miscarriage decreased a lot once a heartbeat could be detected. With that being said, if they can hear the heartbeat at that point, we will probably announce that day.

I know that nothing is a guarantee but we’ve never gotten this far & I feel like, for me personally anyway, I want to celebrate this victory. For the people who say oh, I’d wait till the second trimester, I say, if something bad is going to happen, it’s going to happen. &, quite frankly, I’ve never hidden any of our infertility journey. I’ve been very open about it & I feel that’s a good thing. It’s been a taboo subject for too long. People should be able to talk about infertility in general & miscarriages & receive support from those around them in the event that something does go wrong.

So we don’t see any point in waiting after that & can’t wait to share the news with everyone. 🙂

Again, I will post my disclaimer that if you ruin this announcement (1 of 9085930478023), I will personally be forced to cut you. lol

HCG Check & Updates

Today was another HCG check day. I begrudgingly forced myself to get up early & go in around the same time as I always have (so the numbers are accurate, duh! -crazy paranoid preggo lady).

I got a call a little after lunch from the nurse & she said my Dr, “thinks your numbers are great!”

Of, course this alone was not enough for me so I asked, like I always do, what my HCG was. It was 4037!!!!!!! 

I feel like I keep repeating myself in saying I’ve never had numbers this high before. Once I heard they’re now 4037, I feel like we can rest a little easier now. Scott feels the same.

Right now, I’m just taking it one day at a time & being immensely thankful for the good news we’ve had so far. I’m trying to stay out of catastrophizing that something will go wrong & staying in the place of waiting for the shoe to drop at any second so to speak.

In other news, preggo wise, I started having actual symptoms this week. I threw up Tuesday & I was the MOST excited person on earth about it (because it meant things were going well)! LOL IDK if it was the preggo hormones, or my bronchitis/sinus infection…but I’m going to choose to believe it has something to do with the pregnancy. Also, turn away men, my boobs are HIGHLY sensitive & are now an odd color (TMI lol). Other than that, I’m just extremely sleepy all the time. On top of just being pregnant, the progesterone also helps this along. I took a 2.5 hour nap this evening & I feel like I could nap again. NOTE: I am in now way complaining about any of this, in fact I love it. lol Any positive symptoms are always welcome because that makes me feel like things are going okay.

I have repeat labs again Monday & Thursday, & then, the next week, we have another ultrasound & our first OB appt on Tuesday!!!!!  *squeal

Please continue to keep us in you prayers. We are hoping things continue to go as they are 🙂