Work & Infertility Treatment

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No matter which method of treatment you choose for infertility, one thing remains the same: the Dr’s appointments.

When we did IVF, I had three ultrasounds (AKA monitoring appointments) per cycle. I also had to be available in a three day window for egg retrieval &, depending on that, available for another three day window afterwards for transfer (putting the embabies back in their home).

Even now with our upcoming course of treatment involving only using Femera & trying naturally for two cycles, there are appointments. I have an ultrasound to check for follicle growth (I’m guessing) & an appointment with my gyno’s nurse practitioner afterwards as she’s out of town. In addition, I have another appointment with my Dr. mid June for a second surgery follow up, as well as evaluating how Femera worked for me.

Not to mention that, if this method of treatment fails, we have a consult with another RE near the end of July. To add to the fun, he also happens to be located  over an hour away.

To sum it up, working while undergoing these treatments is hard. Sometimes, doing both can even be damn near impossible (depending on your job and other factors). For that reason, I know a lot of women who opt out of work completely to avoid the headache and added stress of taking off so much.

And then comes the rub…even though you’re available for a plethora of appointments, you’ve also lost a second income &, potentially, the ability to pay for these treatments. It’s a catch 22 at its best. You have more availability for treatment but less ability to pay for it.

As I recently graduated from grad school (wew!!), & even more so since I interviewed for a job, I’ve been thinking a lot about the above. Initially, I’d planned to look for work near the end of summer. I did, however, apply for some jobs with the belief that it would take until then to go through the hiring process. Well, friends, I was wrong! I got an interview a week later & an email this morning from them asking when would be a good time to call, “regarding a position.” Based upon my previous experience in the job market, I feel like that’s a pretty good indicator I’m going to be offered the job. If not, I’d expect the standard, “Thank you, so much for taking the time to interview with us. Unfortunately…..”

While this is a great news for financial reasons, I’m stuck on the fence because of our infertility & journey to parenthood. But it got me thinking a lot on our current dilemma. A dilemma that many other infertile know all too well. It has also inspired me to write an upcoming blog post on HOW to balance work life & infertility TX.

But I need your help…..any input/information is appreciated!

Thank you, friends!

What are your thoughts on infertility treatment and employment??? How did/do you balance work life and treatment??? What words of advice would you give others?????

 

 

18 thoughts on “Work & Infertility Treatment”

  1. I ended up leaving work due to all the appointments and stress. But, I also ended up going back to work (but not for the miserable employer I had originally) when I realized I also cannot just put life on hold when we had no idea if we’d ever actually have a kid. So, I’d say the most important thing to do is to do what’s best for you at the time and know that it could change.

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  2. I know ALL ABOUT THIS. I had a very stressful job during IVF 1. I am now on IVF 2 and it was quite different in that I am working my notice.

    I think in terms of the appointments, what helped me was making a spreadsheet (geek!) listing out the dates and the possible days I would need to be free, based on my dates in IVF 1. This meant that I had a good idea of when I would need to try and be more “flexible” at work and also when we couldn’t be away, etc. I can send it to you if you want.

    In terms of work/quitting, we can’t afford for me to quit. (I earn more than T, and we run on a dual income. We could afford to live on one salary, just about – but it would be HARD.) So it just wasn’t an option for me to quit. However I did buy extra holiday at the start of this year (I don’t know if you can do that where you work) and I decided I’d take the week off for stims – when you have to go in every other day for scans. In the event, I didn’t need to as I was working my notice and they don’t care if you’re in or not! But I definitely think you need to 1) Know what the possible date ranges are; 2) Preferably take time off when you have a bunch of appointments (mainly stims, egg collection) as that is a lot less stressful than trying to make excuses at work.

    Some people tell work, but my work is not that kind of work!

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  4. I didn’t really have the option to stop working because that would mean getting kicked out of the US! But….I did take a bunch of leave third IVF and it was so so much easier physically and emotionally. Looking back I think it made a big difference. I have also been really open with my employer about my treatment….so I gave them lots of warning that I would be on sick leave at some point during week X, and so blocked out meetings/arranged for cover for the whole week, even though I knew I would only be out for 1 or 2 days. That seemed to work for me.

    Could you potentially be upfront with your new employer when you negotiate a start date to say… I can start now, but I should tell you that I will have roughly this many doctors appointments in the coming 2 months..do you think we could work out a plan? You don’t need to tell them why exactly? That’s so tough!

    Congrats BTW on your potential new job!!! 🙂

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  5. I am working now through IVF and it is very tough. Sometimes the stress feels like too much. I did share what I was going through with my boss which helped because now if I have to take off or am late due to an appointment she’s very understanding. On the other hand, I think if I wasn’t working, I might become too obsessive about all the waiting and stress of IVF. Sometimes work is a nice distraction for me. I think there are pros and cons to both. For me, financially and emotionally it made sense for me to keep working. I work in a school though and will have a summer break pretty soon so that will be a huge relief.

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  6. Omg! I was so blessed that my supervisor was accommodating (probably helped that I went in his office and broke down crying)..honestly, if you can trust them to keep it confidential just let them know that you will have appointments that may be frequent. Don’t feel you have to reveal why but if you feel comfortable it may help.

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  7. oh you should definitely go for that job, good luck! I do find it can be hard balancing my job with going through treatment. I’m lucky that I have flexi time though so I try to get early doctor’s appointments like at 7 or 8am and then I can still usually make it to work before 10. There have been times however where the waiting times were long at the clinic and I had to tell work I would be a bit late due to a doctor’s appointment.

    For the egg retrieval the first ivf round I took that day and the day after off sick, got a note from my clinic no problem. And I took a vacation day for the transfer. This time the the egg retrieval and transfer happened around a weekend so I just took a few sick days, also no problem. But then I had a cyst from hormones that ruptured recently and needed another sick day off as I had such bad cramps that day.

    I haven’t told anyone at work about the IVF but my manager probably wonders why I have so many doctor’s appointments since occasionally I can’t get the appointment at a good time and then have to tell him that I will be a bit late to work one day, or that I would need to take a long lunch.

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